4 ways to get rich

Well why is this post so random? Because it's what holidays do to people. They make you RANDOM. Like, totally. Yup, holidays again.

Ok back to getting rich (without the involvement of pyramid schemes). So how?

1. Invest in roti canai
Three years ago roti canai was probably RM 0.60 in most places. Now it may have skyrocketed to like RM1.20 in some places. Invest in roti canai at those places which charge exorbitantly for the coveted(?) piece of dough. You get 100% gain in three years just for doing that. You hear ka-ching in your bank account as cracking sounds of people munching on roti canai (garing) could be heard all over malaysia. Low risk investment - malaysians love roti canai too much to forgo this delicacy.

2. Invest in teh tarik
Teh tarik is to roti canai what coffee is to toast. No teh tarik to go with your roti, where can? IT'S ILLEGAL. Be warned. Increasing the price by 20 cents every two months is justifiable. People might grumble, but alas you can offer incentives. For instance, scratch and win contest for patrons who drink more than 100 cups of teh tarik, and they stand a chance to win two (2) roti canai (plus extra sambal). That should make people happily slurp on their teh tariks, while you happily bathe in their money.

3. Open a teh tarik + roti canai making college
With reference to 1 and 2, people will then realise how good it is to flip roti canais for a living. Hence a degree in Mamak Order of Nutritious Energy-inducing Yummy (MONEY) Food is extremely relevant (and profitable) in this age. Offer scholarships in the form of roti canai dough or condensed milk which can last them for a week's lessons, then, for the rest of the course, charge them a leg for giving them bar coded doughs and patented, fresh condensed milk, from the condensed cow.

4. Kill everyone else.
Well, when there's no comparison, you become the richest person in the world. Avoid mating with wolves, lest things may get hairy. Your descendants, most likely werewolves (Twilight?), might lay their paws at your non-existent assets. If so, repeat cycle, and voila, you're the richest person on earth again.



Told you the horrible things holidays can do to one's brains. Never believe me.